फ़िर कर बैठा दिल ऐसी गुस्ताखी,
करता रहा यह इस कदर इनकार ,
डरता रहा करने से कबूल।
पर  पाना नहीं होता हर चाहत को ,समझ गया यह नादान दिल।
काबू में नहीं होती हर एक धड़कन ,पहचान गया यह दगाबाज़ दिल।
हर कोशिश को करके अनसुना ,यह जानते हुए कि इस गुस्ताखी का कुछ ना है अंजाम,
ना जाने क्यों फिर से पंख पसारने लगा यह अल्लहड़ दिल। 

मेरी आँखों में छाया है नींद का पेहरा
पलकें हैं भारी
मेरी आंखे थक चुकी हैं किसी के इंतज़ार में तकते -तकते
थक चुकी हैं आसू बहा के
थक चुकी हैं सपने देख के किसी के मिलन की
आज चाहती हैं मेरी आंखें कुछ पल चैन के
तन्हाई की परछाई से परे,कुछ पल तारुफ के ....
आँखों ने'ली अंगड़ाई
कहती हैं ,अब तू भी सो जा क्युकि यह  रात का समां
हमेशा इतना हसीन न रहेगा   

Lajja...

चिथड़ो से अपना दामन छिपाये,उस औरत को देख
क्या उसे लज्जा नही आती ?
क्या उसकी नज़रें शर्म से नहीं झुकती ?
पर क्या करे वह बेसहारा स्त्री
जब उसके बच्चे की रोनी सूरत और भूखे पेट में धड़क्ती आग
उसे खुद को शर्मसार करने पर मजबूर करदे
उस पर यह निर्लज समाज उसकी लाचारी को उसकी बेहयायी का नाम दे दे
और उसकी जीवनयापन की चेष्टा को उसकी चरित्रहीनता का सम्बल घोषित कर दिया जाये
तो यह बताओ कि लज्जा आखिर किसे आनी चाहिये ?
उस स्त्री को या उसे तार -तार करने वाली नज़रों को ?

Tears pour down.....

In those long dark sleepless nights

I lie on my bed as I close the  lights

Tears pour down those tired eyes

Oh,the lonliness,the long deep sighs...

My world just went upside down

When I first saw you in the town

You passed by me and I skipped a beat

That hot summer noon in that scorching heat

I could’nt help just looking at you.....

Those long stares and the lovestruck me

Oh how I wish you could just once see

My  heart just wants you and only you....

Some weeks later I saw you again 

I took a step towards you,but it started to rain

A girl came by and held your hand...

You took her closer,as my heart got ripped

oh I was shattered,my soul felt whipped

  

But you looked happy,your eyes had a shine

As I took a breath  guess you were never  mine

Now I feel alone,and you’re far gone

You are always there,in my prayer

Hope you get everything just and fair

Yet tears pour down each night.......

And your face is still in my sight.....
.

Hope....

Hope,it gives you strength each single day to face your image in the mirror.

Hope, it gives you courage every single moment,to fight back the difficult situations,to struggle,stumble and bounce back on your toes.

If life gives you tears,hope gives you reasons to smile.

Hope,it helps you sustain with  all your might.

 Hope,it makes you hold up your fears and win the strife.

 The stars hope to get closer to the moon

 and I hope to get well soon.

 The rives hopes to meet the sea

 and the troubled hopes to get rid of his misery.

The hungry hopes to get a morcel of food

and the poor hopes to get enough to cover its body nude.

 The ones suffering, hope for the pain to end

 and the angels hope that God will someday descend

So cling onto that last thread of hope u've got

 coz hope is what,which makes us moving...no matter what!

Amaltaas ke phool....

यह अमलतास के फूल, बिखरें हैं धरती की सेज पर
यह अमलतास के फूल, निखरें हैं सुरज कि लौ से
पतझड़ की सौगात हैं ,यह अमलतास के फूल
काली घटाओं में खिलते यह पीले पीले, अमलतास के फूल
बरसात की बूँदें समेटें, यह अमलतास के फूल
गीली मिट्टी की सोंधी सुगन्ध को और महकायें, यह अमलतास के फूल
तुम्हारा पेहला तौहफा ,उन वादीयों में बिखरे ,वो अमलतास के फूल
मेरी किताबूं में आज भी संभाल के रखा ,तुम्हारा दिया, वो अमलतास का फूल
उस औरत के बालों से झाकता सुन्दर, अमलतास का फूल
भवरें की प्यास बुझायें, यह अमलतास के फूल
जी चाहता है कि समेट लू अपने आँचल में आज सारे यह अमलतास के फूल .....

Maa.........

 सूनी हैं राहे ,सूना है जहां ,

माँ तेरे साये को छोड़ में आज जाऊं कहाँ ?

लंबी हैं रातें ,धुंदला आसमां ,

तेरी दुआओं का है ऐसा कारवा .....

तुझसे है दिन तुझसे है शाम ,

रुक जा माँ ,अब करले कुछ आराम

                                        तेरी मेहनत का होगा असर ,बस करले आज तू थोडा सबर

                                        तेरे प्यार कि छाव तले ,जल्द ही लहराउंगी में माँ

                                        कठिन रास्तों से भी अब घबराउंगी न मे माँ

                                        करुँगी सर ऊचा में ,तेरी आशायें ना होंगी विफल

                                        पूरी करुँगी में तेरी सारी उमीदें ,तेरे सपनो की डोर को थामुंगी माँ

                                        जीती है तू सिर्फ मेरे लिये ,अब खुद के लिए आज जीले माँ ...........              

                                                 

The power of faith!!

           He was feeling terribly low that evening. Aakash had a weekly off from work, just an ordinary and a regular Saturday, but somehow his heart felt so heavy, that the entire day seemed like a huge mountain to him. Indeed the day was regular but things in his life had not been normal: don’t know from a long time now. Everyone in his life wanted answers, answers to so many questions  they had put infront of him, answers which made them happy, but in his attempt of giving everyone the appropriate answers, Aakash felt that he  had knowingly or unknowingly  lost his own happiness. Who will answer his questions, where are those people now whose support he need at this phase of his life rather than those innumerable questions they put across him? Why is he still so alone, so lonely, when all he wants right now is companionship.
            He decided to make a move, he decided to vent his heart out somehow. He went to a nearby pub, to have some beer, thinking it would make him feel better.  While coming back home, Aakash was quite drunk, drunk to the limit that he could sense and feel the gaping  emptiness and solitude in his life at the moment. Suddenly the 1 km distance from the pub to his home seemed endless. But still he was walking slowly and steadily. He wanted to talk to someone, anyone, and tell him whatever he had in his mind. He wanted to cry his heart out. But he had no one, no one who could hear him and understand him at the same time. In his desperation he decided to call someone, anyone. He called Jus dial.

Jus dial-“Hello. I’m speaking from Jus dial, how may I help you sir?”

Aakash-“Yes, I need help; I need to talk to someone”

Jus dial-“Sir, please can you be a little more specific”

Aakash-  “I just want to talk to someone, will you hear me out?”

Jus dial-“Sorry sir, I won’t be able to talk to you. Do you have any other queries?”

Aakash-“Yes, I want a number.”

Jus dial-“yes sir, can you please be a little more specific so that I can help you easily?”

Aakash-“I want a friend’s number, a friend who will listen to me”

Jus dial-“I am again sorry sir, I won’t be able to help you with that. Any other queries?”

Aakash-“No”

Jus dial-“Thank you for calling Jus dial sir”

And the phone line went blank....

         Aakash, kept the phone back in the pocket of his trousers and continued walking. He didn’t had the clue why he did whatever he did just a few minutes back, neither did he cared about it. He passed a nearby bus stop and spotted an ice cream vendor some distance away from the bus stop. All of a sudden he had this uncontrollable urge to have an ice cream. A rather weird combination, after some pegs of beer, he wanted to have an ice-cream. Again, without bothering about anything else, he went to the ice-cream vendor and bought a cup of Vanilla ice-cream. As he was busy licking the ice cream off his lips and spoon, he noticed a pretty girl seated on the bench just beside the spot where the ice-cream vendor stood. The desire to speak to someone, surfaced again all of a sudden. He wanted to go and sit beside her and let her know what all he’s going through, expecting nothing but patience to listen his words in return. He asked the vendor if he knew the girl, and he came to know that the girl was a ransom stranger who has been waiting for someone probably on the same bench for a couple of hours now.

           Aakash went to the girl and placed himself at one corner of the same bench on which the girl was sitting. The girl didn’t respond at all, as if she didn’t even notice that someone was sitting almost beside her. She was just looking constantly in one direction, blankly. Aakash hesitated but finally spoke,”Are you waiting for someone?”The girl didn’t reply for a moment, but after a few minutes she said,”Yes.”The way she was looking, straight, without blinking her eyes much, Aakash found it a little queer, but he didn’t say anything. The girl said after sometime,”Can you see someone coming wearing a white shirt and a pair of denims, towards this side?”To Aakash’s surprise, he suddenly discovered that the girl was blind. He was filled with genuine sympathy and concern, ”No, who are you waiting for? It’s getting really late now. You should probably go back home.”The girl ignored his remark as if she didn’t hear it all. Later, after a while she again replied, now with a sense of eagerness and impatience in her voice, “I am waiting for my lover. He promised that he would meet me here after he had sorted things out. He must be coming back anytime now. He told me that he would come soon.”Aakash was amazed to see the deep faith the girl had in his love and on his lover. He was deeply moved and touched by the belief she had on her love, that he would sort things out and come back to her. He suddenly pondered on his own life and realised what mistake he has been doing all this while. He suddenly felt liberated and no longer helpless. Why can he have such a similar faith on himself and on God that things in his life too will be fine soon? Is it worth being sad for things when with patience and persistence it can be resolved .And even if those problems which trouble him are out of the extent to be fixed by him, wouldn’t it just help to have some conviction, some positive outlook towards the way he sees the issues in his life? When a girl can portray such amounts of confidence and belief on her love, is it too hard even to believe on himself?

              Suddenly he saw a young man, dressed as the girl has said, in white shirt and denims, coming towards the bench. Aakash understood, it was the girl’s lover and he turned to the girl and said, “your love is coming to get you. I can see him coming now. All the best to both of you.” The girl smiled and said, “I knew he would come. Thank you.”He smiled back standing up from the bench and feeling relived, and started walking his way back towards his home.

Coz every picture speaks something.......!!!

Footprints along the sands of time.....

The sun soaked beauty-Fateh Sagar lake,Udaipur

The sea shores of Port Blair

In Brussels-Belgium

Les Invalids-Paris,France

The ancient city of Rome

Across river Rhine

Lake Lucern, Lucern,Switzerland

Venice ki galiyaan...

Once upon a time...-Across river Rhine,Germany

The glowing waters-Lake Pichola,Udaipur

Kahin na mil jaye hum tum in rasstoon par phir se-A canal lane in Venice

Motherly instincts-On a cruise boat,along river Rhine,Cologne,Germany

Phool  khile hain gulshan gulshan...-My house garden!

Reminiscence of the dark days-The cellular jail(Kala pani),Andaman and Nicobar islands 

Sagar kinare....-Carbon cove beach,Port Blair

Fateh Sagar Lake-Udaipur

Yeh haseen vaadiyan-Udaipur

Embark of a flight-Lake
Pichola,Udaipur

A busy road,in Rome

Innocence at its best-Bauaa... 

Model in making-Ishi...

The cute brother-sister jodi-Bauaa and Ishi...

Yummy cupcakes!!!

Soaring high...

colourful cars..:)

जाड़ो की कडकडाती रात , और  इस रात का पसरा सन्नाटा ,
मेरी तन्हाई ने आज  फिर दी दस्तक और यादो का जमा ऐसा समां
की यह मेरी सासों की  गर्मी है या तुम्हारे एहसास की तपन , कुछ मालूम न पड़ा
मेरे कानो में  उठ  रही आवाजें,आस -पास  बिखरे तुम्हारे आखरी ख़त के  उड़ने की है या मेरे दिल के
तार -तार  की होने की ,कुछ मालूम न पड़ा
 यह आँखों की नमी है या दिल  में उठे  सैलाब का पानी ,कुछ मालूम न पड़ा
यह तुमसे फिर मिलने की बेचैनी है या तुम्हे खो  की मायूसी,कुछ मालूम न पड़ा
इस रात की रुसवाई और सब कुछ जानते  हुए तुम्हे वापस पाने की  वो  बेवजह बेताबी  का न  जाने फिर   क्यों मेरे मन में घिरना ..........कुछ मालूम न पड़ा !!!

         

Heartbreak!!

                    She was so thrilled. She had finally realised it at last after fighting and struggling with her own thoughts about him. She had feelings for him. she always had feelings for him from a long time as right after their first few casual talks she had started liking him. He was so different, unlike other guys she had ever interacted with. He was gentle, kind and understanding. The best thing was she felt so close, so comfortable with him in spite of the fact that they both were so different from each other individually. She was bubbly, chirpy and talkative. He was almost opposite, grave, mature and serious. She decided to communicate with him, this time openly. To tell him what she really felt for him. Suddenly she couldn’t wait any longer and grabbed her cell phone. She had his number in the recent call log so she dialled him immediately .She could hear his caller tune again already after hearing it before so many times, a  fine and  soothing instrumental music  which just eases the caller rather than irritates him/her(which happens most of the times with caller tunes, they just divert your attention and make you forget the purpose you dialled the person’s number for).It was exactly like him, the way he is. So relaxing, so peaceful. After a minute finally he came on line.

               She heard his soft, restful voice. She replied, ”hey it’s me!!”She could sense his happiness and excitement now.”Oh! I was about to call you. What a pleasant coincidence! I wanted to tell you something.”  When she sensed his excitement and his eagerness to share something with her, chills ran through her body .She was just mentally praying in her head...Oh! God, I hope he’s just thinking exactly what I am thinking right now. She replied, ”oh cool go ahead!!”He paused for a moment and said ,”wait a minute. You called me so you should tell me what it is first. Why did you call me? Isn’t it just and fair?”She went blank and nervous. She wasn’t suddenly able to remember at all why she had called him. She tried to sound normal and said,”oh nothing specific. I just called you casually. Go on I want to hear what you have to say.”He was as if expecting this reply for her side and almost willing to vent out whatever he had to, he replied ,”oh ok, then it’s me who has to speak right now. I am dying to tell you this” .She could feel the goose bumps on her hand, the hand which held the phone.

              She said, ”come on ,then tell me. What are you waiting for?”She again said a short prayer in her head, ”God ,hope he feels the way I feel for him” He was talking very slowly now, very cautiously, as if he’s disclosing some confidential covert. He said,”The thing is, I am in love”. She just stopped dead holding the railing of her balcony. She couldn't believe her ears. He grew a little worried when he didn’t hear any response from her side. He said”hello, are you there”. She woke up as if from a dream and replied, ”yes, yes, oh that is great!!That is really wonderful!”He sounded really relived and extremely happy, ”she is  just so perfect for me. I can’t believe that I am in love. She is just so special. It feels so good.’’ She was beaming  and busy scratching the paint off the railing of her balcony with her nails in extreme exhilaration. She replied, ”Oh  that is so amazing !what’s her name? Where did you guys meet? Who is the special girl” half knowing and half hoping that it’s her. She said again in her head,” He takes my name, oh God please.”

He was a little hesitant but later when he couldn’t hide it anymore not at least from her, he replied, ”well, I met the angel in our college. You know her very well” Now she was confused. Was he playing tricks with her or was it someone else .She told herself, it can’t be the other way round...relax! She asked or rather pressed further, “But who is this angel you suddenly fell in love with??”He whispered, ”shh....don’t talk so loudly, I haven’t told it to anyone yet except you, and you are supposed to keep it to yourself until unless I tell this to her, the girl of my dreams, the girl whom I love. She’s in our class only infact she’s our teammate. That is all I can tell you as of now. You will be the first of all my friends to know who she is shortly, trust me”

               She was suddenly numb. She just couldn’t move and stood still. A tear dropped from her  eyes, she  didn’t realise  knowingly or unknowingly. The railing felt cold or she guessed it was her hand which went so cold. She couldn’t respond, couldn’t comprehend anything. How can this happen. They were childhood friends. They used to hang out together and spend so much time together that he could not have got the time to talk to anyone else apart from her. They were so close, and he was never friends with any other girl except her .Or let’s face it he wasn’t ever so comfortable talking  or interacting with any other girl except her.She was the only one he shared everything with. She could feel her hand holding the phone trembling. He replied, ”hello, are you there? What happened?”She suddenly came to her senses on hearing his voice. Her voice crackled when she spoke now, but  somehow managing to control herself for the last time ,she  replied ”All the best, I will always pray for you and your happiness. I should go now. My mom just called me for some urgent work . Bye” He replied, ”oh yes, I  can’t wait for tomorrow when I will finally tell her about my feelings. See you at college tomorrow. Thanks a lot buddy!”The word” buddy” was like a sting to her ears now. He said, ’Bye” and she immediately hung up the phone because she didn’t had anything more to say now.

Again a long sleepless night,your thoughts lingering in my mind.....

Again that restless attempt to stop myself from thinking about you....

Again that desperation, that desire to get back something lost,lost long back...

Again those teary eyes, gazing the moon,remembering the times together.

Once again.....that dreaded nightmare,your image coming alive....

Your voice in my ears,first faint,then becoming louder and louder....

Again,your everlasting memories surfacing up,in that seemingly never ending lonely dark night....

जी चाहता है इस वक्त को यूँ थाम लूं 

 बारिश की फिसलती बून्दूं का पैगाम दूं 

है हर समय अनमोल ,कुछ अछा कुछ बुरा , जीयो हर एक पल  

क्यूंकि ऐसा न हो कि तुम्हे फिर याद आये बीता कल 

लहरो की बेताबी को खुद में समा लो 

भूलो हर ग़म ,ख़ुशी को अपना  बना लो 

मिलना और बिचादना तोह है नियति का खेल 

कितना अजीब  इत्तेफाक है हमारा मेल 

जी चाहता है ,कि हर डर को पार कर लूँ 

तुम्हारे चेहरे कि मुस्कान एक बार फिर गुलज़ार कर दूं 

है तुमसे कुछ नाता ज़रूर ,पर इस रिशते को में  आखीर क्या नाम दूं .......

I don't know why......

At age 78, she can still amaze with her childlike enthusiasm towards life .. Nani!

Those tender eyes ,those wrinkled lines

Those completly white locks of hair,and your  flawless  flair

Your never sinking spirit of life, your readiness for every strife

Your wise talks yet the hidden innocence that lies in them sometimes

That shine on your face on seeing the ones you love, that eagerness, that concern

Your telling us stories of Little mermaid under the moonlit sky,and  the next day’s wonderful breakfast you made,your forcing us to take bath before we ate and the hue and cry

I remember your effort and frustration of trying to teach me knitting ending up in vain

The smell of the mysore sandal powder in your house,your firmness yet no pain

That sublime and unconditional  love of yours which I always feel,though I never say,I don’t know why.

Growing up and staying busy,never made me to forget missing you when you are not around,

I always feel your warmth,once in a while....but all I can say is I just don't express,I don’t know why.....

Geet...........

Gun gun gun kyoon mein gungunaoon?

Sun sun sun is anjaan dil ko kaise samjhaoon?

yeh toh baar baar palti khata jaaye.....

phir koi nayi daastan duhraye.......

Gun gun gun kyoon mein gungunaoon?

Sun sun sun is anjaan dil ko kaise samjhaoon?

yeh aasmaan kyoon lage itna suhana

yeh panchi toh gaye raag wahi purana

Barishoon ki boonde mujhe kyoon aaj rujhaye

yeh hawaeyein mere kaano mein sarsarayein

yeh kaisa junoon hai,yeh kaisa nasha hai

kyoon lage har pal pyara,kyoon sab kuch bhala hai?

kyoon khwaishein uthe,nayi umange lehlehrayein.........

Aaj zindagi nayi raah par hai kadam badhaye

Hai jeet ka bharosa,aur khud par hai aas

Udane ki lalak mein,yeh pankh phir phadphadaye...

Gun gun gun kyoon mein gungunaoon?

Sun sun sun is anjaan dil ko kaise samjhaoon?

 

Goodbye......

I don't want to get lost,but the silence around,scares me.
The days seem to so long,darker than the nights.
I don't want to leave yet,but the loneliness which surrounds me,
Everything looks so gloomy,so vague.
The veil of emptiness,blinds me.
I just can't stand the sudden stream of light pouring inside through the windows.
I am tired of expressing myself,making them to understand me.
I can't struggle anymore,willing to quit,to surrender.
There's no way out,no escape from this inner turmoil.
Wish it was'ant so late.
Situations are complex now,more like the enmeshed threads of a spider's web.
The more you try to solve them,the further you get entangled.
What may seem true,is sadly not the just reality.
Life's a mirage,I've discovered it now,in pursuit of my search for the oasis of happiness.
My soul is not yet ready to sublime.
But things have lost control,gone much way beyond my comprehension.
Guess,its time for me to go now.

(PS-The above lines are a work of fiction.It bears no resemblance and relation to the writer in any way whatsoever.)  

बैठे बैठे क्यूं गम हो जाती  हूँ?
उन गुज़रे लम्हूं के खयालूँ में क्यूं डूब जाती हूँ?
कुछ भूली यादूं का ताना बना ऐसा
की कुछ यूँ बेखबर हो जाती हूँ....
सोचती हूँ....
दिल की अगर एक दूकान होती,तो उसमे हमारा दिल भी बिकता
पर दिल है ऐसा कि एक बार टूटे तो दूकान में न दिखता
चाहे जितने मरहम लगा लो फिर वह बात न आती
दिल की पहले जैसी कीमत न रह जाती
उस दिल को लोग दिल ना कहते,बिखरे टुकड़ो का गठन बन कर रह जाता
कभी वह भी एक खूबसूरत दिल हुआ करता जो दुकानों में सजता
पर आज किसी और की गलती की सज़ा ये दिल क्यों इस कदर भुगतता?
की हर  इलाज बेअसर लगता,इस टूटे दिल का ज़ख्म कभी न भरता

Wish....

The waves crash against the shore,sweeping the sand away each time again and again.
My wet foot marks are getting brushed away by a sudden high tide.
Wish such a tide could wash away the all hidden memories clinging at the back of my mind.


The hard rocks getting bashed up by the angry sea,each time it tries to reach the shore.
Wish one such soul could be my rock,strong and solid,protecting me always.


The raindrops falling on my cheeks,take away my tears along.
Wish such a rainfall could also take away the buried pain in my heart.


The trees baring themselves to the blowing wind,giving up all they have,fearlessly.
Wish it was so easy to let things go and submit yourself without inhibition.


The soft breeze,striking my face gently,as if comforting me.
Wish someone could be by my side in such a way,pulling me back each time I fall.

The dozen stars illuminating the nightly sky.
Wish one such star could brighten me up all over again.

A peep within myself

                I have been feeling a lot of things from the past few days.Feelings ranging from loneliness and sadness sometimes to panic at others.Sometimes I felt fully charged up and enthusiastic but moments later I felt homesick,nostalgic or maybe fear gripped.
                I thought as though my life was just running away,running way ahead,beyond my control.It was as if  I have lost the reins of my life,everything was moving so fast pushing me behind ,I competing against time.There was a queer turmoil within my mind.It was as if I intended so much to do,so much to achieve,but time was slipping away from my hands.
                I came across a book named."Life is what you make it" a fiction novel by an Indian author,Preeti Shenoy.I instantly liked the book when I glanced the first page which had a beautiful inspiring poem.I identified with the lead female protagonist of the book who was exactly of my age.I was deeply engrossed in the book and now when I am about to finish the book,I realized a lot of important things.
               Firstly,Life is short and undecided indeed but yes you can steer the life's path according to your own terms and in your direction just by pure determination,faith and self-confidence.Just remember,"You are the captain of your soul and master of your own fate".
               Secondly,appreciate the gift of your precious life and the people associated with you.Don't expect too much from people,they are there to make our lives easier but not to lead our own life.They can help us out but cannot live our life for us.It's we who have to fight back,our own way.Whatever we get from God of from our well wishers,we should learn to accept it graciously without being selfish and wanting more.
                Lastly,live life your own way.Don't let anyone in this world overpower you and make decisions for you.Trust your own instincts and learn from your own mistakes.So think wisely,live it,dream it and love it.

Those were the days.......back then!!

Life was so simple back then.

I hiding behind my mother and she sheilding me from all my fears.

I used to lose my toys and books back then,but now life seems to have lost its track somehow.

All I used to worry about was my torn clothes,sprained ankles and bruised knee,now I worry about my hopes and dreams ,struggling to sustain them.

My world used to revolve around my mother,her glimpse easing and erasing all my pain.But the world has become bigger now and pain even more intense.

My mother wiping off the tears from my rosy little cheeks,bringing back the shine in my eyes and the smile on my face.The lines of anziety and stress now crisscross my forehead,the smile has diminished,the softness of my mother’s hand does not seem to fix things up.

My slow staggering steps,my mother keeping a watchful eye on me,ushering me to move ahead steadily.Her words were so magical back then,they still are but the path has become more difficult and challenging now.

I remember my mother telling me that I’ll be amazed when I’ll grow up.Yes,things amaze me now when I've grown up.

People were not so complex as they are now.

Life was so simple back then.

Invictus

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever Gods may be
For my unconquered soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeoning of chance
My head is bloody,but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears

Looms but the horror of shade,
And yet menace of the years
Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishment the scroll,
I am the master of my fate;
I am the captain of my soul.

 


(I found these lines written by William Ernest Henley very inspiring and really close to my heart so here it is on my blog.)

The chicken's tale!!

Have you ever seen the plight in my eyes?
The fear of death,I counting my each breath.
Have you ever seen my terrified expression?
The sight of humans disgusts me.
Not that it  really matters to you,but have you  ever seen the way I despise you?
You feed me,raising my hopes about life,
and then one day,you wipe out my existence,it all comes to an end for us by the strike of your brutal knife.
My other counterparts,flap their wings and hop up and down their cage,
but that just the beginning stage.
It comes to all of us,one by one,striking us down,
without any fault and no justice around.
We pray for our lives each time,but still we get punished for some unknown crime.
One day I wish you humans will suffer and endure pain,
because you know its always a reverse chain.
You sow what you reap,its not always a gain,
My prayers will surely be not in vain.

kuch kisse dil ke.....

Kitna khoya,itna soya sa ye lamha aaj kyoon hai?
Chahe jitne bulbule khud uda lo,do pal khulke kyun na muskura lo,theri theri si kahani aaj kyoon hai?
Dhadakte dil ki chahe jitni awaaze sun lo,
yeh toh apni hi dhun mein na jaane aaj kyoon mast hai?
Awara panchi ki rahen aaj kyoon gum hain?
Kuch karo,kuch suno,yun na sust tum raho
Kyunki yeh poori zindagaani lage ki aaj kam hai.........

Turning 21......

Each time I'll fall behind,
I'll muster my courage, strengthen my mind.
Each time I'll stumble upon a rock,
I'll get up again and clear all block.
Each time the scorching sun rays make me blind,
I'll gather my will,nothing can stop me,no difficulties of any kind.
Each time I'll see darkness and nothing bright,
the fire within me will guide,I'll definitely find light.
Each time my spirits will go down,
I'll still sustain my hope and will never frown.
Each time a tear will roll from my eyes,
I'll encourage myself,look you covered so many miles.
Each time I'll fail,
the ship of my confidence,in the bellowing sea,will continue to sail.
Each time the wind will sway my ship to and fro,
I'll become stronger,I'll grow.
Each time I'll feel that things are not fine,
I'll rise,determined to shine.
Each time I'll bear pain,
I''ll never forget,there's always sunshine after rain.
I'll learn from life,from instances which may seem juvenile,
Each time I'll restore my faith and promise I'll always smile.

The history exam

Let’s look into the conversation of two class 9^th students who have a history exam just after Republic day.

Boy 1-Mangesh,Boy 2-Mohit, Taklu-The bald history teacher, Mr  Ravi Karmarkar, Champion-The class topper, Varun, Miss  Chikni-The pretty English teacher, Miss Rosie Gonsalves

Boy1 calls up Boy2 on republic day at 9 am.

Boy 1-Hello, hey dude wassup?? What took u so long to answer my call??

Boy 2- (sleepily) Bro, it’s a holiday and what makes you think that I would be awake at 9 am in the morning??In spite of it being Miss chikni’s lecture I am not able to keep my eyes wide open if she takes up the first lecture in school.

Boy1-yeah yeah, I know that pretty well. But ever since that Taklu has declared an exam, I have not been able to close my eyes Buddy!! Seriously! I hate History and he has given 5 chapters for the exam, The Indian freedom struggle…..it’s so boring..!!

Boy2-Oh Fuck!!I almost forgot about the exam tomorrow. Oh I just wish Taklu rot’s in hell yaar, seriously!!I thought on 26^th I will hang around with my building friends or probably catch a movie. It’s the only day when all of them will be free, no swimming classes; no guitar classes and no tuitions to attend.

Boy1-hmm, that’s true….I have my tuitions even on Sundays yaar. Anyways how much have you studied till now?

Boy2-Yaar I had started with Gandhi’s  umm umm…I just  can’t remember the name of the struggle yaar….yes yes Gandhi’s Satyagrah andolan  in my tuition some days back and it’s so boring that when my sir was reading the text through the book, I was checking out my sir’s  cute daughter, who also studies with us. God she is soo pretty….and she looks totally hot when she tries to concentrate.

Boy1-Dude wake up, I just called up Champion, he has finished almost 3 chapters and he said that its really difficult. If it’s difficult for him, you just  think about our fate!!I am telling you, we’re totally screwed. I haven’t started studying properly yet and I am panicking now. Let’s strategize now and study. You know that very well that Taklu makes everyone sits according to their roll numbers during any exam, and dude your roll number is just next to mine. So let’s bang on each other. You do some portion and I will do some of it. say what?

Boy2-ok ok, I generally don’t freak out, but now you are scaring me. Ok let’s go through the contents one by one now.

Boy1- Listen up to me now. Champion was telling me that Gandhi is very important. A full 10marks essay type question is expected to come on his life and contributions in India’s freedom struggle .It’s  a full2-3 page answer in taklu’s notes but my tuition sir made it simpler for me. I have it in just 1 and a half page. I will mug that up and come.

Boy2-ohk cool. My tuition sir just made me write short notes on Civil disobedience movement and Simon commission. I think that’s also important for exam point of view. Taklu was shouting about its importance in some lecture. I vaguely remember that I heard him saying its really important.

Boy1-  ohk done. Let’s split the other important topics as well now. You will be doing the Quit India movement, khilafat   movement and Dandi March  and I will do the Non-cooperation movement and Partion  of India.

Boy2-dude, that’s unfair!!You gave me 3 topics and you yourself will be studying just two?? What about Nehru, Tilak and the rest of the other stupid fighters. I can’t remember their names also as of now.

Boy1-OK !! I will study the other freedom fighters. Now happy??.Ok fine let’s start studying now .keep in touch and let me know when you   are done with all the topics. Hope our strategy works. How can anyone study all of it alone man?? Yeah except for aliens like champion.

Boy2-seriously bro, the syllabus is vast. Lets pray we both pass the exam. Co-operation  and mutual help will make us pass this struggle. I am just waiting  for the moment  when we are done with history. It’s so brutal. We have it in class 10^th as well and its worse. They have comparative study between Gandhi and Nehru and other fighters. Who the hell cares  what these morons did some 60 years back? We should look beyond now. anyways, all the best  buddy!!

Boy1-I seriously agree with you dude. Gandhi is the worst of them all. He did so much and it’s so difficult to remember what all stupidity he did. All the best to you as well my friend. Catch you later now.

He hangs up the phone.

Au Revoir

Like the waves sweeping away everything on the sea shore, it’s all getting wiped.

I, walking on the beach, the cold sand, jagged pebbles, rubbing against my feet, I can’t feel it anymore.

The winds running past me, my loose hair, my skirt blowing away with the wind, It does not matters to me anymore.

It’s been such a long time, where have you been all this while?

Where have you vanished? You’ve become a stranger, your words don’t seem to answer my questions anymore.

The distances between us becoming wider and wider, now it seems we are miles apart.

Your soothing voice which used to linger in my ears day and night, I can’t hear it anymore.

My destiny is not bounded with you; I can’t see myself with you any longer.

Your vision in my memory is getting blurred and hazy; I think I am loosing you.

Your smell on my blouse, its fading away, my feelings, I think I can’t hold back to them all over again.

Your memories, haunting me, I think I can’t stand it now.

The sun is going down, the sky all red and crimson, I sitting on a rock; look at the deep waters gushing directly beneath me.

The time has come finally, a new life awaits leaving behind everything I behold, I take a deep breath and say,”Good bye my angel, we’ll meet again, this time forever, with no misery, no cries and no pain…!”